What do I possibly have to say? What is there? I'm so tiiiiiiired of training. I want my life back. Ah, that's not true. I do want my life back, but I'm not sure if I'm tired of training - I'm still making gains.
I'm still proud for having done the century ride last weekend. I swam just under 2 miles today. Yesterday - no new distances, but I rode with a bike that fit me properly for the first time and WOW! I can ride my bike, it turns out. Went fast, kids; I'd say I started to lose the line between a person on a machine and an organ-muscle machine riding an aluminum one, but the sweat, aches and occasional crankiness kept my wah-wah humanity front and center. My first impulse is to say it was exciting to feel my potential opening up, but I feel more like a basic frustration melted away - I wasn't fighting anything, and my bike was letting my legs do what they were really capable of. $200 well spent? Sigh. Probably. Ugh.
Getting really stressed about the fundraising, and opening myself up to the possibility that I'll be going out-of-pocket for what I can't raise between my current $4300 and the $6500 I need. I have 80% of a party planned, but a couple details just won't settle themselves...and the training schedule doesn't leave a whole lot of time for much besides work and tri. But! It's what I signed up for, so ahead I charge.
My brain feels flattened out.
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